Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Ouch, that hurt!

I was reading through some posts on-line about adoption, like usual. One title really caught my eye. It said something along the lines of “Agency turned us down because of medical history”. A woman was talking about how she and her husband were trying to adopt from Russia and they were denied because she has Marfan's (I had to look it up too) and her husband is bi-polar. Yadayada, not the point. Well, that did scare me since I am physically disabled but I “hear” that other countries are more stringent when it comes to parents with disabilities, so it didn’t get to me too much since we are adopting domestically.

Anyway, a woman responded with her own frustrations having  Marfan's and adopting; very understandable. But she continued and said something like, “My doctors say I’m fine, it’s not like I’m an invalid.” Ouch, that hurt!

I know I know, it’s not like she was saying, “At least I’m not an invalid like that dumb chick Shanell who thinks that she’s going to adopt!” But that’s what I heard. It’s not fair to pick on this woman, she is probably sweet as candy but that’s my reality.

I am an invalid. I am in a wheelchair. I can’t dress myself, bathe myself, brush my own hair, or take a shower by myself. I need help to do most everything. I don’t get the benefit of the doubt. I can explain and explain and explain but everyone already looked at me and saw me for what I am, an invalid. (Booooooooooooo for self-pity. Boooooooooooooooooooo)

So why do I want a baby so bad? Why? Even if I could get pregnant, it would be such a struggle. My body probably couldn’t handle it anyway. I’d be weaker, it would be harder, I wouldn’t be able to work. I don’t want that, but I want a baby. A few months ago I contacted a fertility clinic. The lady was excited to help me but said they couldn’t unless I had a letter from my doctor saying I was healthy enough to have a baby. Yea, that put a stop to that one. I hate that crack heads can pop out 10 babies, are they healthy enough to have a baby? “It’s not like I’m a crack head!” Sorry if I offended any crack heads out there.

More to come Chickies! I’m feeling chatty today!

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